Humour, Prose

‘Dear Beary …’ [17]

by Beary McBearface Hello there! My name’s Beary, one of the giant teddy bears who hang out in the JCR – I’m the brown one; my purple counterpart is John Henry. As The Poor Print’s self-anointed agony aunt, I’m here to help you with any troubles you’re facing. Please send me your college (or general) […]

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Comment, Prose

A Word from the Editors

by Siddiq Islam The brain is a mysterious thing. Its complexities are so far beyond our understanding. We cannot say much about why we think the way we do, why we construct certain schemas, why Beary McBearface can have such wild dreams as the one he relates in his answer to ‘Dear Beary’ question 2. […]

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Poetry

So Mad Was I

by Siddiq Islam I’d heard of His trials and temptations before, butHe didn’t just leave them out, peppered around.He crammed my tongue full with them, muzzled my jaws shutAnd tilted my head back to make them go down.So mad was I. This was the God I had followed,Lifting my tongue up to check that I’d […]

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Comment, Prose

Sulphur Sticks and the Myth of Nation Building

by Bertie Castello 6 AM on a Tuesday morning. Florentine friend sends me a link, possibly reminiscing our transalpine past with the typical sarcastic grin that comes naturally with our undying emigrant superiority complex. Italians are interesting creatures. Recently, it has been asserted, intra Orielensia moenia, that we may in fact be Untermenschen, as we […]

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Culture, Prose, Reviews

‘Troy Story: Age of the Hero’ Review

by S. Hardaker Troy Story: Age of the Hero is an adventurous and ambitious tale of the Battle of Troy, told through the personal stories of the gods, Achilles (played by Jak Spencer) and Patroclus (Alex Rawnsley), as well as Hector (Gillian Konko) and Andromache (Erin Malinowski). Marketed as a night of myth, a journey […]

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Humour, Prose

DayLight Robbery

by y/n Dick, You’re holding the gun against me so gently. Ironic, since there’s already an arrow lodged deep within my chest. Your smouldering gaze holds me frozen in place and my heart skips a beat. I knew you would come for me. ‘Everyone thinks they know my story’, you say. But they’ve only heard […]

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Humour, Prose

‘Dear Beary …’ [16]

by Beary McBearface Hello there! My name’s Beary, one of the giant teddy bears who hang out in the JCR – I’m the brown one; my purple counterpart is John Henry. As The Poor Print’s self-anointed agony aunt, I’m here to help you with any troubles you’re facing. Please send me your college (or general) […]

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Humour, Prose

A Tortoise’s Revenge

by Becky Collett Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there lived a boy named Alex. Alex was 19 years old, and an avid rower, belonging to the notoriously rowing-obsessed Oxford college – Oriel. And because he was the men’s rowing captain, both he and the women’s captain were entitled to a […]

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Poetry

On Second Thoughts,

by Siddiq Islam that thing I had planned to dowas probably not that great of an ideaanyways. Silly concoctions of the mindbreak away,biscuit crumbs soakingin the Earl Grey of common sense. ‘Swap unrealitiesfor sturdy, long-term investments,’ they tell me.‘Just like crypto!’On second thoughts, maybe not … And on third thoughts, swim in it.Drown and laugh […]

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Poetry

Permanence

by S. Hardaker limbs and flower stems seem oddly similar,branching and stretching and aching in their own ways;growing pains, a reminder of maturing. my legs are slowly giving way.i am 11,i am 15. i have stopped growing now,the legs say,you are stuck like this. the wind changed.a gust could whisk petals away,start a new bed. […]

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Comment, Prose

Why Do We Care More About Van Gogh’s Sunflowers Than Real Ones?

by Anna Bartlett (JCR Environment Officer) Again, headlines have been filled with reports of the ‘extreme’ tactics of environmental protesters due to the actions of a couple of soup-spewing youths. For some reason (beyond what I can fathom as rational), this event appears to have horrified some people more than the collapse of life on […]

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Interview, Prose

An Interview With …

by Evie Sharp In this column, The Poor Print will interview various people around college to find out more about their everyday lives. In this issue, Evie Sharp speaks with one of the new additions to Oriel’s team of friendly porters. Carlos Giménez tells her about his favourite places, activities and memories. 1. What is […]

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Art, Culture, Prose

Noah Davis: Reshaping Scars

by David Akanji Davis’s work, which was exhibited at the David Zwirner around this time last year, is still especially ground-breaking today. Davis prematurely died in 2015 at the age of 32, but his work focused on the reframing of what it means to be black. His piece The Year of the Coxswain captures the […]

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Humour, Prose

‘Dear Beary …’ [16]

by Beary McBearface Hello there! My name’s Beary, one of the giant teddy bears who hang out in the JCR – I’m the brown one; my purple counterpart is John Henry. As The Poor Print’s self-anointed agony aunt, I’m here to help you with any troubles you’re facing. Please send me your college (or general) […]

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Comment, Prose

Scars

by Pia Regensburger A scar is a mark left on the skin after a wound or an injury has healed. This definition likely comes to mind first and foremost in any reflection on scars. The scars we see, the marks left on our bodies bearing witness to past experiences, are likely to remind us of […]

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Poetry

I Have No Scars

by Ayomikun Bolaji I searched my body for scarsFigured I’d write about how I got them Take a flight down memory laneTalk about how I fought through the painProudly flex my badge of honourFrom that one time I climbed a towerOr something … I don’t have anyScars, I don’t have any scarsAt least no major […]

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Poetry

Forever Part of Me

by O Collopy I always think it’s getting betterBut then something triggers a memory:A phrase or photo in my mind,Then the shockwaves retaliate. Months of progress gone to waste,Or just trying to move on in haste?Is this how I’m supposed to heal?If only I could hear how you feel! My deepest desires long for beforeTruly […]

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Humour, Prose

‘Dear Beary …’ [15]

by Beary McBearface Hello there! My name’s Beary, one of the giant teddy bears who hang out in the JCR – I’m the brown one; my purple counterpart is John Henry. As The Poor Print’s self-anointed agony aunt, I’m here to help you with any troubles you’re facing. Please send me your college (or general) […]

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Comment, Prose

Oxford Union Debate Review

by Jenny Heath Motion:This House Has No Confidencein His Majesty’s Government. At the annual Oxford Union debate on confidence in our government, 45 people voted that they had confidence in our government. Less than 24 hours later, Kwasi Kwarteng was fired as Chancellor in the latest twist in what can only be described as a […]

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Comment, Prose

Art School Was a Weird One for Me

by Anonymous Art school was a weird one for me. I remember feeling very invalid, unschooled and also, and probably most poignantly, too ‘uncomplacent’. I think white complacency is a hallmark of contemporary art. It operates in how comfortable white people can engage with autonomy, because they have grown up in a world that has […]

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Song

It’s Not Too Hard

by Siddiq Islam Editor’s note: You can listen to Siddiq’s song reposted on The Poor Print’s SoundCloud page, or by following this link. [Chorus]It’s not too hardIt isn’t difficult to figure out what you’re thinkingI can tell from your arms and your hips and the rate of your blinkingThe twitch in your fingertips and all […]

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Comment, Prose

Losing and Gaining Linguistic Instincts

by Nikita Jain In the couple of weeks since I arrived in the south of France, I’ve realised that my quest for perfection is the main barrier stopping me from improving my French. I’m so afraid of making mistakes that I often find myself rehearsing sentences in my head before I contribute to a conversation. […]

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Comment, Prose

A Word from the Editors: Future

by Monim Wains Hence, the future beckons, as it always does. With the last issue of this academic year, you move on, dear reader, turning a new page. But, I wonder, how big will the change be? Is the summer just a page break? Or a whole new chapter of life? Although the university seems […]

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Comment, Prose

Nineteen Eighty-Nine

by Anonymous Victoria Park: on this site, in 2022, nothing happened. For thirty years, people had gathered at the park in Hong Kong in remembrance of those who died on 4 June 1989, at the hands of a regime that sent its military on its own people. Hong Kong had been the only city in […]

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College, Humour, Prose

Operation Quackers

by The Yellow Feathers This is a transcription of an intercepted meeting of the 696th Airborne, the ‘Yellow Feathers’. Triangulation of signals places the location somewhere in the Hall rafters. Little is known about the covert division, although the code names of the commanders have been declassified for public release. The latest intelligence suggests that […]

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Comic

Future

by Noah S. Adhikari I wish I could go into the future. That would be amazing. I could see when I get my black belt in karate. But the real thing is that someone has said that they have already been in the future and said that I will never get my black belt! Noah […]

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Poetry

We’ll Have a Love Like

by Siddiq Islam we’ll have a love likeslow indie moviestwo stubborn youths withno cares or duties we’llkiss on the street andlaugh on the bus they’llnot say a word they’llnot bother us we’llsteal mother’s blankets gobeneath them in the library we’llpretend we’re working hard but we’re justgiggling under quietlyyou’ll bake me bowls of pasta andi’ll write […]

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Poetry

Hereafter

by Joe Lever When Keats had fears that he may cease to be,Alone to night he turned, to shore in thoughtThose thoughts against the nothingness – and heResolved to unhand all he wrote and wrought. Still, he lives on; and now I take his placeIn thinking, fearing, knowing that my beingHere is but an accident […]

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Comment, Prose

Musings on the Merging of Presents and Futures

by Ada Sevimli I learnt so much about the world around me, primarily that I know so little about it. In classes, seminars, and during revision, I filled a small but precious pool of knowledge and relished in its beauty. Took pride in the fact that it glistened like the foreheads of those who labour […]

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Poetry

British Summer Sunshine

by Monim Wains Finally! My window was bright!My room was filled with glowing light! After months of grey and cloudiness wet,A t-shirt and shorts were a decent bet. So out I came smiling with glee,Everyone blinking and squinting to see. I saw that tourists had filled up the townAnd the river had punts all the […]

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Poetry

People Have Always

by Siddiq Islam People have always sun-swum in the summer,And bathed in broad buttercups under blue skies.People have always been meadow-grass thumbers,And combed with fresh fingers the fields where they lie. Oh, let me go back to those mild, milky meadows,Where life flows with ease, undisrupted and mellow.I’d stretch like a starfish, alone there for […]

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Artwork, Cartoon, Poetry

Awful Summer

by Noah S. Adhikari Summer is the best … … but!Have you ever thought that summer could be the worst? Meet Jack. He has had the worst summer ever. Here is why: When it was summer, Jack was playing with the water.He caught a cold, and that made him cross. So that’s why he has […]

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Humour, Prose

Dear Beary… [15]

by Beary McBearface Beary McBearface, treasured Oriel mascot and JCR staple, is here to help you with your troubles. In this column, Beary will attempt to find solutions to your little college worries; trust him, he’s seen it all. To contact him, all you have to do is send an email to thepoorprint@oriel.ox.ac.uk with the […]

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Humour, Prose

Dear Beary … [14]

by Beary McBearface Beary McBearface, treasured Oriel mascot and JCR staple, is here to help you with your troubles. In this column, Beary will attempt to find solutions to your little college worries; trust him, he’s seen it all. To contact him, all you have to do is send an email to thepoorprint@oriel.ox.ac.uk with the […]

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Comment, Prose

A Word from the Editors: Unity

by Jerric Chong Behold, how good and joyful a thing it is: brethren, to dwell together in unity! Psalm 113:1 As I write this, Sam Ryder has just given the UK our best result in twenty years at the Eurovision Song Contest: a goodly 466 points to finish in second place. The victorious act (most […]

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Creative Writing, Prose

When We’re United, We’re Unstoppable

by Madeline Dougherty ‘Mages! Fica! We have done it! Only the cowardly Elite leaders remain of the Tenebrum army. Today you have fought hard and we have lost many valuable members. Some of you have sacrificed family members, lovers, friends, children. We appreciate the efforts and pain you have endured today and it will be […]

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Artwork, Poetry

The Universe Awake

by Monim Wains Silence.No sound, nor light, nor existence at all.The universe idled, in a trance.  It wasn’t still, though, not perfectly so,Growing from the tiniest speck to the size of a room, to size of the sky, and space, and time.It was evolving, and changing, and turning, all the while asleep. Because, for all […]

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Creative Writing, Prose

Family Tree

by Monim Wains ‘Altitude, 200 metres … 100 metres … 50 … 20 … brace for landing.’ The constant hum of the jets got louder, fiercer as we got closer to the ground. Four beams of flame bore down on the land as the starship slowed to almost a hover before dropping for the last […]

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