Stolen Moments of Pedestrian Desire in the Radcliffe Camera

by Anonymous

To the girl across from me in the Rad Cam:
You know well who you are;
You thought I missed your quiet looks,
But I hold them in my heart.

‘Maybe he’ll Oxfess me! Or pass a note –
He’d have to be adroit!’
No doubt you’re thinking, or daydreaming.
I’m sorry to disappoint …

‘A Maccies date, then, an Ahmed’s trip!
A Tuesday night in Plush!’
But nor these three do I intend;
My plans are more hush-hush.

‘What could it be? What do you want?’
She no doubt needs to know,
But my dear, you see, there’s more to me
Than most would care to know …

’Tis not the pub, the club, or foody truck,
That really gets my rocks off:
The dogs for me! For so you see,
I’d prefer you with your socks off!

Do you get the gist!? Do you understand?!
I scarcely could be clearer;
You have to let the puppies breathe!
Bring those tootsies nearer!

Not at Plush, nor Atik, nor Najar’s
Do I intend to meet;
My snout runs out beneath the desk …
I want to sniff your feet.

The Poor Print

Established in 2013, The Poor Print is the student-run newspaper of Oriel College, Oxford, written by members of the JCR, MCR, SCR and staff. New issues are published fortnightly during term. Our current Executive Editors are Siddiq Islam and Jerric Chong.

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